Tsunami Disaster

67,000 people dead in Asia ... and those who search and rescue and not even close to being done. The count is sure to rise. I cannot even wrap my mind around something as devastating as that.

It's so easy to be indifferent because this tragedy affects people on the other side of the world. Until a couple of days ago I would have butchered the definition of tsunami on a multiple choice test.

I was watching CNN a on Monday and they had a clip of a dad carrying his young son who had died in the tragedy. All I could do was hug my daughter ...

Coffee in a car … literally.

Last week I stopped at Starbucks on the way home from Houston. I really enjoy good strong coffee and for reasons not relevant to this post, on that day I hadn’t had my normal caffeine consumption quota. So I was really looking forward to a strong cup of Christmas blend.

It kinda ticks me off that during the holidays, all Starbucks brews for “coffee of the day” is Christmas blend. At least during the other 10 ½ months there is a variety. Sumatra is my all time favorite “coffee of the day” and it is the least often served. I should quit whining and buy myself a pound of Sumatra and just brew it at home.

But on this day I braved the traffic in Pearland and made it to the Starbucks on 518. It was super crowded with holiday shoppers and after standing in line for a while listening to people order half caf non-fat frapawhippedcreame non-coffee dessert drinks; I ordered a cup of Christmas Blend and a oatmeal cranberry mountain bar for me and ordered a Chai Latte to take home to Andrea. The coffee smelled really good and I couldn’t wait to get on the road and take a drink. I was having one of those massive cravings that intensified the closer I got to moving beyond the smell and onto the consummation of tasting the strong coffee.

I pulled out of the shopping center and got behind a lady at the red light who was in her convertible with the top down screaming at the top of her lungs at every driver who was, in her estimation, an idiot for being in her way. She was one of those “as a matter of fact I do own the road” kinds of people. I thought it was funny enough to watch for a while. I was holding my cup of coffee in my free hand and due to the distraction hadn’t taken a drink. I decided I should set it down until I could get on the highway so that it wouldn’t be such a distraction. As I set my cup down I was watching the lady who was still screaming at people using words a discipleship pastor cannot type into his blog, and I missed the cup holder by a mere fraction of an inch and dumped the whole cup of black coffee all over the front seat of my car and my blue jeans and a book I had on the floorboard and on a business card notebook – it was everywhere.

I was not a happy camper. I was already behind schedule and out of pocket change. I was in traffic and was not about to go back and brave the line at Starbucks. All I could do was drive home and eat my oatmeal cranberry mountain bar and sniff the smell of heaven in a cup … well … not in a cup anymore. Now it was heaven all over my floorboard.

Sometimes what I want the most seems in my grasp, but my clumsiness and fascination with the irrelevant details around me puts it out of reach. Maybe I didn’t need that cup of coffee anyway. Some parts of some days stink, even when they smell like coffee. At least Andrea enjoyed the Chai.

20 miles

I ran 20 miles yesterday morning. It was cold, it was ugly, it was brutal, but I made it. Hopefully at the end of the day on January 16, 2005 I will be able to say the last three words of that sentence.

The 20 miler was the longest run on this marathon training program. One of my goals for marathon training was to at least make it to the starting line and barring some freak accident I'll make it, so I am happy. Now all that is left is a three week taper, and to run and finish the race. I have no other goal. No time goal, no one to try to beat except my mind.

Snow?

Snow in Lake Jackson Texas on Christmas morning ... how strange is that?

This will be a Christmas my kids will never forget.

I'll be back ...

Someone emailed me yesterday and asked "have you quit blogging?" Which surprised me that they noticed. But no I haven't retired from blogging forever. It's just that blogging has been a low priority in the list of priorities and there hasn't been much in my head worth blogging about anyway (not that there ever is).

Like Arnold though, "I'll be back." (Read with an Austrian accent)

The Lost Art of Living

the cross neither jewelry nor icon nor charm
the cross held a lover who died in my arms
under the weight of the hammer I held
the space between heaven and everything
spanned
and the lost art of living was found again
when the cross became loving and Christ became friend

- ben pasley

Sports?

The sports world has gone crazy. The dramas are overshadowing the games and it makes all of it almost unwatchable - from fights with the fans to steroid use.

I’m amazed. Mainly I’m amazed that people are surprised at the recent news that confirms some athletes have used steroids. I usually give people the benefit of the doubt, but it takes a lot to surprise or shock me anymore. Haven’t we all had this sneaking suspicion that the sports records that are broken lately are broken with the help of chemicals?

Check out this article about the Balco founder --> Link

Well it’s off to a minor league hockey game.... Go Aeros!

Teaching Big and Teaching Small

I’ve thought quite a bit lately about what it means to be a teacher. I have always enjoyed teaching, but most of my teaching experience is in a small group setting. It hasn’t been until recently that I have taught in front of a large group of people with a more formal delivery style. What I do in on Sunday mornings is very different than what I do in a Home Team (small group) at Brazos Pointe Fellowship. In a small group I am more a part of the learning experience rather than driving the learning experience – I am just a participant in the conversation.

Maggi Dawn is an Anglican priest and Chaplin at King’s College Cambridge in England and she teaches in the college context. Here’s what she says about teaching in a large group setting:

“In a lecture you stand six feet above contradiction (or down in the safety of the auditorium stage); you are in control of the material, you prepare beforehand, you say what you have to say and no-one gets to ask you anything.”

Sometimes that’s what Sunday morning feels like … “six feet above contradiction”. And that is why I like teaching in a small group setting as much as a large group and sometimes more. Listen again to Maggie Dawn this time about the small group setting:

“…you talk for a while, and then other people pile in. They discuss … They ask questions that range far and wide; great questions that would take twenty minutes to address properly, or sometimes aggressive questions based on an adverse reaction to a text. In a class(small group), the teacher is just as likely (perhaps more likely even) to learn something new than the students.”

To be in a small group is to engage with fellow travelers in this journey of life as a follower of Jesus; it's to understand others and be understood. It's to engage other Christians so that you can more readily engage the world around you.

Teaching teaches me and that’s why I like to teach. But my hope for those of you who listen is that you would engage as a fellow learner, and if you ever think “I don’t know if I agree with Tommy”, then nail me with it. I may not come around to your way of thinking but I would love to have the conversation.

Again from Maggie Dawn’s blog; she quotes someone named Joseph Joubert:

"To teach is to learn twice."

“Those who never retract their opinions love themselves more than they love the truth.”

For more from Maggie Dawn click here -> link

Oh, Christmas Tree

We went as a family and picked out a skinny Christmas tree tonight. It was an all time record short time. Jakeb grabbed a tree and said “How about this one?” And we all said, “looks good”. The Stunz family agreed on something, quickly, from the beginning (a first).

Then we got home and things changed. Tori and Jakeb got into an argument about the lights on the tree. Tori thought the tree should have all white lights, Jakeb thought the lights should be colorful. His position was that colorful lights are better for when you wake up in the morning and turn them on (Jakeb still has a sense of wonder and awe at Christmas). Tori thought all white lights would be “cool”. So we had a family vote. Jakeb rallied the troops and he, Anna and I formed an alliance and voted Tori off of the island…. Okay not really, she’s still on the island but the Christmas tree has colorful lights on it.

Have a Heart

Caution: running post ahead. If you are sick of reading about my running you can skip this next post.

At the beginning of last year I read John “the penguin” Bingham and Jenny Hadfield’s book Marathoning for Mortals. In it they said that most people, given the correct training, have the physical ability to run a marathon (26.2 miles). The reason most people don’t run one is because they don’t have the heart for it.



This morning I was perfectly physically capable of running the eight miles my training schedule called for but my heart wasn’t into it. I got out anyway and when I was finished I was glad I ran.

I’ve sung this same tune here before, but today it got me to thinking about choices in life in general. Running is such a mental pursuit, just like life. If I could just make up my mind that I will do the hard thing and make the best choice rather than taking the easy way out and choosing the thing that will destroy me.

"Today I have given you the choice between life and death, between blessings and curses. I call on heaven and earth to witness the choice you make. Oh, that you would choose life, that you and your descendants might live!”
Deuteronomy 30:19

I have the capacity to make the right choice; sometimes I don’t have the heart for it.

How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb

I have a hard time spending money. Some would even call me a tight-wad. I agonize over most of my purchases before I buy. The only exclusion to that would possibly be books; when I buy a book I usually know exactly what I want and go get it. And then if it stunk after I read it I regret having spent the money on it. Andrea is sometimes frustrated by having to shop with me. This Christmas already we’ve stood staring at a Christmas present for someone in our family while I wondered whether we really should buy it or not. That is another story for another day.



Today, after agonizing for a while over whether I should; I spent some of my money on U2’s newest How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb. After the first couple of listens I dig it. I really like music that has a soul and this does. I haven’t been completely enthralled by anything U2 since The Joshua Tree or maybe Rattle and Hum so I hope this one grows on me even more.

So … how do you dismantle an atomic bomb? Bono says “with love.”

Learning

This has been a great week. It started with spending time alone with Andrea; and at Thanksgiving our whole family was able to spend time with my parents, brother, his wife and her family; then this morning I ran. Tomorrow I get to finish the week by doing something I love as well … preaching at Brazos Pointe.

God made me a teacher and I really enjoy it. But before He made me a teacher He made me a learner. One of the main reasons I like to teach is the prep. I learn way more than I am able to give away. And then I think I like it because I get to make people think and ask questions about God’s place in their life and what it means to be a follower of Jesus.

During this time of year when everyone is thinking about what they are thankful for, I am thankful that God made me a learner and I am thankful that He has given me a place to pass what I learned along to others.

Travel, Detours and Adventure

Monday morning Andrea and I left for a couple of days away in New Braunfels. The timing was perfect and the kids were with my mom so it was sure to be a good trip. We were going to stay in some friend’s house (because of their incredible generosity) on the Guadalupe River in New Braunfels.

We left Lake Jackson and it was warm and muggy. By the time we got to Wharton it was raining a little bit. It had already rained enough for there to be road closures. But being the pioneers that we are we pressed on.

As we continued along we got to the turn-off to go toward Garwood (a favorite route of ours taught to us by my dad) and the road was closed due to high water in the Colorado River. So we went through the town of Eagle Lake instead. By the time we got to I-10 in Columbus it was raining so hard it was hard to see and driving was s-l-o-w …

When we got to Sequin we pulled off of the highway to eat at Los Cucos (one of our favorite Mexican food restaurants) and there was deep water flowing over the road. We thought about it for a second or two and then plowed through the water (anything for Mexican food).

After leaving the restaurant with our stomachs extremely full we exited I-10 on 46 to New Braunfels and got a couple of miles down the road and found that the road was closed due to high water. Now we’re kind of worried. Are we going to be able to make it to the house on a river that is probably flooded as well?

Being the pioneers that we still are … we pressed on and took a detour through San Antonio, seeing our trip as yet another adventure in the Stunz marriage. We finally made it to New Braunfels and headed down River Road towards the house. Barely ¼ of a mile down the road there was water flowing over the road enough to keep us from going on. So … we started looking for an alternate route and found one through the town of Gruene (pronounced “green”). As we headed down river road there were places where the water had come off of the hills and washed the road out but our mighty SUV made it through every time.

We made it over the river crossings without and problem even though the Guadalupe was up very high and got to the house. The upstairs of the house is level with the road and the downstairs of the house is level with the river. We went inside and from above there is a balcony and an excellent view of the swollen Guadalupe, which is normally 25 to 50 yards away but is now right out of the back door but receding.

We decided to take a look downstairs and as we walked down the steps there was a weird reflection at the bottom of the stairs. Andrea flipped the light switch on and we saw that the weird reflection was water. After checking to make sure I wouldn’t get electrocuted I stepped into the water which was about calf deep. I went to the back door and opened it and the water rushed out. The good part is that the downstairs of the house has concrete floors and cinderblock walls. The water wasn’t deep enough to get to the mattresses on the beds so really there was not much damage. Andrea and I spent the evening wet-vacing the water out and we had a blast working together. We have always enjoyed working together.

We crashed that evening after a long day of travel, detours and adventure. That pretty much sums up our marriage – travel, detours and adventure. In 16 years we’ve come a long way through some fun stuff and through some hard stuff. And in all of it we have tried to see how good it is.

Tuesday and Wednesday were relaxing days. We sat by the river that went back into its banks, ate at the Grist Mill in Gruene (again by the generosity of others) and Chipotle and spent some time at Starbucks. All of those are favorites of ours.

The three days were great and today on Thanksgiving Day I am grateful. I am grateful for the generosity of others. I am grateful for a wife who is willing to go through the adventure of life with me. I am grateful for so many other things … the list is long.

BTW – If you’d like to rent an excellent house on the Guadalupe this summer, I may be able to hook you up.

Leaving town

Yesterday was a long exhausting day. It started early and ended late. At the end of the day Andrea and I just fell into bed. It was a good tired though because in all of our work some good things happened.

So today we are hitting the road to get away, leave town and rest (and celebrate our previously mentioned anniversary). We are both looking forward to it. I think I will take an electronic fast and not blog again until we get back.

Have a Happy Thanksgiving (my favorite holiday of the year)!

My son, my dad, and working on cars

Today Jakeb and I replaced the brake calipers, balanced and rotated the tires, and changed the oil in my Explorer. It reminded me of being a kid again. My dad is a mechanic and I grew up around a gas station.

Smells trigger memories and when I smell brake cleaner, brake fluid, old oil, or tire rubber I think of growing up around my dad. Mom has a picture of me when I was six or seven with dad teaching me how to weld. I changed my first water pump in a car when I was in seventh grade. Before I could drive in high school I was changing clutches in manual transmissions and rebuilding engines.

My dad taught me more than how to work on a car while I was learning to work on cars. He taught me what it means to have a strong work ethic, how to treat people with respect and about honesty in business. I learned how mean people can be when they think you are their servant and I learn how to stand your ground while treating others fairly.

I hope Jakeb learns how to work on cars, but I hope he doesn’t leave the more important things undone either.

Our marriage could drive ...

Tomorrow Andrea and I will celebrate our 16th wedding anniversary. If our marriage was a kid it could start driving.

I stare at that first sentence and it’s hard to believe. I know everyone says this but it doesn’t seem like it’s been 16 years, and yet I can’t remember what life was like without Andrea. I read a book … (that’s how a lot of my sentences start) … anyway, I read a book called The Alchemist where the hero of the book meets the woman he was to spend the rest of his life with and he said to her “I loved you before I even knew you existed.”

I think that’s why I can’t imagine life without Andrea… because I have never lived life without her. My parents always taught me there was someone out there for me and I loved her before I knew who she was.

Happy Anniversary Andrea! I love you!

Crockerdile Blogger

A couple of months ago I told you about my friend Danny who is starting a church in Tomball called The Way Fellowship Church. It will be a church kind of like ours (but different). Brazos Pointe Fellowship is a sponsor church for The Way.

I tell you all of that because Danny’s wife Lizanne has started blogging. I hope she posts more than her husband has. One thing I can guarantee about Lizanne is that the post and the discussion will be interesting – in a good way – because Lizanne is the kind of person who makes you think.

You can read it here ---> Link

Sleep well

Life has been insanely busy and will continue to be that way for the next couple of days so posting on this blog has not been a top priority. But as I get ready to crash I think about a cool verse I read on Michael Main's blog:

I will lie down in peace and sleep, for you alone, O Lord, will keep me safe. Psalm 4:8

Tall grass and green trees

The weather was a bit cooler this morning. As I ran I noticed that most of the trees are still green. A few of them are losing their leaves but for the most part Oyster Creek Drive looks pretty much like it does in May.

And then I got home and mowed my yard. It’s November and I mowed my yard. It is no secret that I like hot weather a whole lot more than I care for cold weather. But don’t I eventually get a break from having to mow the yard?

Texas weather … I love it.

Yasser Arafat's Burial

I watched this morning as Yasser Arafat was being buried at Ramallah. For some reason all I could think about is the stark contrast between the ways the Palestinians bury a leader as opposed to how American’s bury theirs.

Ronald Reagan’s funeral and memorials were full of reverence, pomp and circumstance. It was “stately”. Yasser Arafat’s burial on the other hand looked like the mosh pit at a rock concert as people emptied the clips of their weapons into the air. Then everyone left to finish the observance of one of their most holy times of the year.

I’m not saying one way was better than the other to bury a leader. Each in its own unique way honored the one being buried. What intrigues me the most is the differences in cultures.

Dangers of running in the dark.

I was running yesterday morning a little after 6a.m. As I ran south on Yaupon just north of Oyster Creek drive I saw two women running in front of me. They were running a little slower than me on the same sidewalk and I knew I would have to pass them. For me this is always an uncomfortable situation because you never want to startle someone in the dark – especially if you are a male and they are female.

A couple of years ago I was running in the winter one evening and this lady was checking her mail. She was shining her flashlight into her mailbox as I ran by and I surprised her by doing nothing but running. If her flashlight would have been a gun I wouldn’t be sitting at my keyboard typing right now. My wife would be husbandless and my kids fatherless because she would have taken me out. Needless to say I am a little gun shy (no pun intended).

Anyway, yesterday morning at mile 1.5 of a seven miler as I ran up behind these two women in the dark I started coughing and scraping my shoes on the sidewalk and generally trying to make enough noise to let them know I was there. As I got close they still hadn’t looked back so I stepped off in the grass and tried to give them wide berth (I probably should have gone all the way to the other side of the street). One of them looked back at me nonchalantly and when she did the other one looked back and jumped and said “Oh MY GOSH!” I prepared myself to be blinded by the spray of mace – but thankfully this morning they didn’t have any. And come to find out one of them goes to our church.

I write all of that to ask a simple question. What’s the etiquette? When I approach another runner at night from behind traveling faster than them and they never acknowledge that I am there. Should I start screaming at about 100 yards out, “Hi up there?!?! My name is Tommy and I am a runner! I am not a serial killer! Please don’t mace me … or shoot me … or stun gun me … or beat me up with your cane!”

??????

How Would Jesus Vote?

As I was getting ready to crash a couple of nights ago, I was setting the time and volume of my radio alarm clock and I heard a southern drawl from the voice of a radio preacher as he exhorted listeners. “The victorious result of this election, leading to the second term of the president George dubya Bush is a diiiirect result of the prayers of Christians and I want to thank all of the listeners to this radio program for those prayers.”

There is a lot wrapped up in that statement that troubles me in a way I can’t quite put my finger on. Sometimes I think “Christians” believe that God is an American and that if Jesus were here he today he would be a middle-class white Republican who would agree and endorse even the smallest detail of the Christian sub-culture.

Brian McLaren in his book, A Generous Orthodoxy asks, “Has he (Jesus) become less our Lord and more our Mascot?”

Jesus called us to a life as one of his followers. I think Jesus rather than being our Lord who we should follow has at times become the banner we hold up to justify our way of thinking and acting. Which is sad because you know what? I have some godly friends who are no less Christian than you or I and they made a very prayerful decision to vote for John Kerry…

David's Dance Party USA

Last night at High Pointe I read a poem written by Jarrett Stevens. Jarrett is a teaching pastor for Axis at Willow Creek. Axis is a gathering for twenty-somethings. The poem is Jarrett's reflection of 1 Chronicles 15 and 2 Samuel 6. It's called "David's Dance Party USA". You can read it here ----> Link

The simple in the world of the complex

I’m reading a book by Paulo Coelho called The Pilgrimage. It is about a man (Coelho) who takes a pilgrimage and walks The Road to San Tiago in Spain which ends at the mortal remains of the apostle James. Along the road he learns some “practices” from his spiritual director, Petrus. Petrus tells him:

“The … practices are so simple that people like you, who are used to making life too complicated, ascribe little value to them.”

Although Petrus isn't teaching Coelho traditional spiritual disciplines, I wonder how often I have ascribed little value to the spiritual disciplines of Christianity because I think life should be way more complicated? Sometimes the disciplines of the Christian faith are so simple that in the world where everything else is complicated I have to ask myself “how could this possibly be doing me any good?”

But when I neglect “Being still and knowing God is God”, it’s then I realize how the simple can be so profound.

A Prayer for Today from Scott Williams

This is a prayer Scott Williams posted on his blog for his readers that I thought I should pray for you:

a prayer for today
May God bless you with discomfort at easy answers, half truths, superficial relationships, so that you will live deep within your heart.
May God bless you with anger at injustice, oppression and exploitation of people so that you will work for justice, equality and peace.
May God bless you with tears to shed for those who suffer from pain, rejection, starvation and war, so that you will reach out your hand to comfort them and change their pain into joy.
And may God bless you with the foolishness to think that you can make a difference in the world, so that you will do the things which others tell you cannot be done.

Voting

I just got back from voting. As I walked up to the school where I vote, there was a man there who gave me a pencil and a fingernail file with the name of the candidate he supports printed on them. Are my fingernails not round enough or smooth enough already? And then there was this lady who desperately shoved a red piece of paper in my hands giving me detailed instructions about how to write in the name of the candidate she supports.

As I went into the voting "booth", I looked at the names on the paper in front of me and thought about the enormous amount of effort even local candidates and their election team put forth to get elected. For what? To have your life placed under a microscope and be criticized by everyone? I don't know if they all shouldn’t have their head examined for subjecting themselves to the process of just making on the ballot.

I know ... they do it for a noble cause - public service. I guess all of them must want to be in office pretty bad to put up with what it takes to get there.

Things I'd like to do before I die ...

Last year I listened to Robert Lewis preach a message about prayerfully making a list of things you’d like to do before you die and then having that list be your “North Star”; kind of a guide for life. I’ve never been a “write your goals down and follow them” kind of guy. For some reason that seems too rigid for me. But Robert Lewis’ list has an element of dreaming that connects with me. It’s not so pragmatic as the list that the goal setters say I should be making.

Robert Lewis says I should finish the following statements. Before I die, I want to:
Be…
Do…
Have …
Help …
Enjoy …
Leave …

Although I never got around to being as specific as Robert Lewis I think I’ve always had a list. Here are just a few, some which I have already done. None of which are in any specific order.

Before I die I want to …
… go into the ministry.
… learn to be a craftsman, who makes beautiful intricate wooden things.
… see the Himalayas (specifically Mt. Everest – although I have no interest in risking my life to get to the top).
… grow old with Andrea (and show her more love then than I ever have).
… watch my kids grow up to own their own faith.
... learn to play a guitar well.
… to run a marathon.

And there’s more.

That last one I think is on my radar to accomplish next. This morning I ran 12 miles. I have not been telling people that I am training for a marathon BUT I have been following Hal Higdon’s marathon training program for novices. I promised myself that if I got to the 12-mile long run I would let other people in on it. Not to impress lil billy or anyone else. Not to make myself look good, but mainly so I have accountability. Now there is no backing down.



I have trained for two marathons but never made it to the starting line. But this time I am determined to finish my first marathon. The marathon is the HP Houston Marathon on January 16th, 2005 (hey Kirk, I'd like that Sunday off?) I have no time goal, I just want to RUN 26.2 miles. EQ has inspired me. Pray for him as he runs the NYC next Sunday.

Then it’s on to the next “Before I die I want to …” on my list.

Fine Dining

Yesterday I took Andrea to a fine restaurant for lunch. Mondays are our day off and we like to spend the day doing what ever we do together. It’s one of the ways we try to stay connected.

We like to dine at this restaurant on some of those Mondays. The reason we go has more to do with the company than the food although the food’s not too bad. This restaurant is in an older building with long benches for the patrons to sit on as they eat. Everyone there is really friendly – even playful. You pick up your food buffet style in a line and there are “servers” who walk up and down the isles with ketchup bottles for the “guests”, should they need some. Most of the people who eat there are a whole lot shorter than me but I don’t mind. Most of them don’t eat much either, they spend their 30 minute lunch socializing with those around them.

The name of the restaurant? – A .P. Beutel Elementary cafeteria. Andrea and I ate lunch with our five year old daughter Anna. Sitting on the small cafeteria tables brings back a flood of memories from childhood. Sometimes I wish I could go back to being 5 years old in kindergarten but sometimes you couldn’t offer me enough to go back to the beginning of a journey that has brought me where I am today.

When I think about it, I am at a good place in life. Even though there are pressures in being an adult, I’ve worked through a lot of life to get where I am now. Other than fond memories I think it’s okay that on a bunch of different levels I’ve left childhood behind. I also think it’s okay that on other levels I am still a child at heart.

Making Marbles Boards

Saturday Andrea and I spent the day making marbles boards. Marbles is a homemade board game that is played with marbles and cards and involves strategy and a ruthless lack of mercy. It is usually played in teams with guys against girls.

I enjoy working on marbles boards. I wouldn’t want to do it everyday but it is fun to lose yourself while working with a piece of wood. Making marbles boards is far from fine craftsmanship but it does allow me to cut, sand and route wood and feel like I could build fine furniture if I took the time to learn and just bought a few more tools ($$).

Life holds so much I’d like to do and experience but for now the focus of my life has to be more narrow than those things. And I’m okay with that.

Astros and homework

The Astros lost.

That’s not big news to most of you because you already know it. It is amazing to me how the mood of everyone on this side of Texas declined. It’s like we lost a war or a president died or something.

What amazes me more is how many people have become baseball fans. My daughter Tori watched the last two games with great interest. One of her teachers told the class if the Astros go to the World Series there would be no home work. Tori paid attention every strike and ball. She went crazy screaming for joy when the Astros did something worthy of cheering.

Today there will be homework for Tori’s class … But hey! There’s always next year.

Inspired by McManus

I am at Willow Creek this week at a conference called "Communicating in Today's Reality". It is a conference which seeks to help teachers and preachers speak Christianity into the language of the culture. Yesterday I heard Bill Hybels, Ed Young Jr. and Erwin McManus.

I don't know Erwin McManus but Ronnie does. I've read a couple of his books and both had a strong effect on me. Yesterday I listened to his main session and then went to his Q&A breakout session. I don't know that I've ever heard anyone with such a passion not only for God but for life in general. On one of Ronnie's blogs someone accused him of being "new age" and leading people away from Jesus. But having seen him up close - I can't imagine anyone meeting or hearing or reading Erwin McManus and being anything but drawn toward God.

I'm only 1/2 way through the conference, but if it ended now it would have been worth the trip.

Running Pharisee

I ran this morning … in the rain. I’ve said here before, one of the reasons I like to run is because it is a solitary pursuit. I get to be alone and think for thirty minutes or so. That is not completely true though. Every morning I run I see at least a couple of other people. Some running, some walking for exercise, some walking the dog, so I am not all the way alone.

There is this guy who is a runner, I don't know his name. He and I cross paths most mornings. Our training schedules must be similar. As we pass one another we are cordial and say “good morning” and comment on the humidity or lack thereof. Well this morning in the rain he wasn’t out running. No one was out running (or out period) but me.

I felt smug and self-satisfied. I may not run as fast or as far as the guy I pass in the mornings (or I may – who knows?) but I am a far superior runner because I am dedicated. No one can match my runner’s piety. I run in the rain while others shudder in their warm houses. Yea me!

The religious leaders of Jesus’ day, called Pharisees, used to pray daily, “Thank You God that I was not born a gentile, a woman, or a dog.” They were smug and self-satisfied, and felt superior to those with less religious piety. This morning while running I prayed, “Thank you God that I am not a slacker, warming my bed or watching Fox News or ESPN or clicking my mouse in the pre-dawn light. Thank You that I am out running in the rain.”

I am such a Pharisee …

Life without a computer

Around the office today there is a frenzy of backing-up, deleting and finishing work on all kinds of computer files. Tomorrow we are going to start the process of switching over to a new computer system here at the offices of BPF. Instead of having a bunch of stand alone computers connected to a computer network we are going to get a couple of servers to handle files, email, etc.

Not only is there a computer frenzy, there is wailing and weeping and gnashing of teeth. “How can we could possibly have to do without computer for a day or two or three or don’t even tell me it could be four!!??!” The question I’ve been asking myself is, “how did people do ministry before there was a computer?”

Could I possibly preach a message without being able to consult online Bible commentaries and 10 different versions of the Bible in nine different languages? What about my Bible software that helps me see those different versions of the Bible side-by-side? And without the internet I can’t listen to other preachers for research and “google” the text and read every sermon on a specific subject from preachers from the last hundred years until now.

How do we keep up with the folks who come to our church? We couldn’t possibly do it on paper.

How do people order books and curriculum without amazon.com and a credit card? You don’t expect me to talk to someone on the phone do you?

Maybe I don’t need to be fasting from food … maybe I need an electronic fast. One that allows me to do work that doesn’t involve staring at a screen. Maybe I need a fast that allows me to connect with people face-to-face or at least voice-to-voice rather than in a white box with a blinking cursor.

Don’t get me wrong I love technology. I am a technology geek. But sometimes I tire of it as well. Maybe that’s why I will have to do without a computer for a couple of days.

I write my blog posts on a yellow legal pad and key them in from the house or something.

The Great Pumpkin

This morning I ran three miles at 6am. As I ran toward Christ Lutheran Church there were bright lights cutting through the darkness in front of the building and on the ground were lots of something all piled up. As I got closer I realized that they were having a fall pumpkin patch.

The pumpkins are arranged all over the ground where kids can walk up and down aisles to pick one to take home (although there was no one there @ 6am). A light rain was falling and it made the pumpkins shiny. It made me feel like it was fall … except that the humidity was about a thousand percent and it was almost eighty degrees. I was wet as much from sweat as I was from rain.



As I ran on past the “great” pumpkin patch all I could think about was being a kid. It’s funny how this time of year makes everyone want to be a kid again. But I thought about how much the Stunz family liked to watch Charlie Brown movies at a time when cartoons only came on Saturday morning, it was cool to have one on TV at night. I thought about It’s The Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown. How Linus missed out on trick-or-treating because he was convinced if he stayed in the pumpkin patch he would see The Great Pumpkin. How his self-proclaimed girlfriend Sally would faithfully sit with him, not for a view of a great pumpkin but just to be with Linus. And how Charlie Brown ended up with a ghost costume with too many eye-holes and a rock in his trick-or-treat bag at every house. The best thing about a good story is that you see yourself in at least one of the characters.



It was good to be a kid. Sometimes it still is. And memories like that help a run seem short.

Astro's Fever

The males at the office are coming down with an illness. If it continues to progress it will have us all at home by three o'clock. Laying in front of the TV trying to make it all better.

I'm sure we'll be better tomorrow morning and make it to work ... but this illness will probably reoccur tomorrow at the same time.

cough ... ugh ... cough .....

Simplicity

The world’s been going by fast lately. Have you ever been there?

I read a book by Richard Foster called Celebration of Discipline a couple of years ago. Reading it introduced me to a some disciplines that I have never practiced. The church tradition I grew up in didn’t practice them so they were new to me. Among them were silence, solitude and simplicity. I would love to say that I faithfully practice all three, but sometimes it is hit and miss. All three disciplines have led me deeper in my relationship with God.

Simplicity though, was almost revolutionary for me. Sometimes when I talk about the disciple of simplicity with other people they give me this weird look. A look that says at the very least this guy is crazy at his worst he must be lazy. Simplicity is neither.

Simplicity is about ordering your world around God’s priorities for you. I’ve heard some say, “I wish God would give me more hours in a day.” But think about what that says about God. He hasn’t given me enough time to do everything he wants me to get done.

“We are trapped by a maze of competing attachments.” – Richard Foster

Simplicity is about understanding God’s priorities and the being able to live life with those priorities in mind. That doesn’t mean that the work won’t get hard, but Jesus said that his yoke was easy and his load was light. Jesus had enough time to get done everything in God’s will for his life.

I sound like a preacher … but I say all of that to say. I think I’ve let the discipline of simplicity slip by me lately. I wonder what I’ve tried to do outside of what God has for me …

BTW – MM our student minister also LOVES the chapter in Foster’s book about simplicity. Ask her about it.

Belonging(s)

What do you think of when you hear the word belongings? Normally I think about my stuff. If there were a fire in my house after everyone was out I would want the firefighters to put water on the fire and save some of my belongings. I insure my belongings.

But the dictionary says that to "belong" is to be a natural member or a part. How do my material possessions make me a part of anything - except a consumeristic society that is marked by loneliness?

I find it interesting that the word belongings could come from such an important word as belonging. What a difference an "s" makes.

In his book "the SEARCH to BELONG" Joseph R. Myers says:

"your true "belongings" are not your possessions, but your relationships".

Think about that for a while...

The curve of the earth and the moon.

This evening I flew to Chicago for a workshop at Willow Creek. As the sun started going down I looked out of the airplane window from 41000 feet at the horizon and could see the curve of the earth. It was an impressive sight. It reminded me of how incredible creation is and how we can see the hand of God all around us if we would just stop long enough to look.

As we flew north I looked at the horizon to the northeast and saw a brilliantly bright light below us. Not the kind of light that comes from cities below an airplane but a light that made the surface of the earth appear to be on fire. I watched and even weirded out for a second or two. Then I realized what I was looking at was the full moon rising over the northeastern horizon. The angle at which I saw it made it look like if we were flying towards it we would be able to fly over it in the airplane.

As we continued to fly the moon matched our height and eventually rose "over" us. It was a beautiful full moon and once again made me realize I was seeing the fingerprints of God.

Baptism

Baptisms, communion, funerals and weddings always cause emotion to stir in me. The symbols and pictures played out by the participants are incredible. In baptism the picture of new life, in communion the weight of what Jesus accomplished for others and me and what he will one day do as he returns, for weddings and the picture of love of Jesus has for his church, and funerals for the hope … hope that the life we live today will one day stretch into eternity.

Today at Brazos Pointe we had a baptism. Four people were baptized and I got to help Greg as we baptized a husband and wife together. I never get tired of baptisms. The idea of people dying to themselves and raising from the water to live a new life in Jesus touches me every time. Especially when I get to watch it so close … even be involved.

Orderliness

"Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind. The true scientists were rated as heretics by the church, but they were truly religious men because of their faith in the orderliness of the universe." - Albert Einstein

I've been reading a lot lately, but nothing I thought worth blogging about because I was sure no one would not want to hear it. But I ran across this quote today and it made me think. Like Phillip Hintze said in an earlier comment, Einstein is a quote machine. I think I've heard or read somewhere that Einstein was a pretty smart guy.

I have read quite a bit about science and how it relates to our faith and for the most part I have a hard time seeing what the big deal is. I think the two fit well together. There are so many issues people want to debate about the balance between faith and reason or science but I believe when they do they miss the bigger issue. The fact that the universe is just too stinking orderly to be one big accident.

Share The Well

Caedmon's Call writes, records and performs music that really speaks to me. They have a new CD that will be released in October. You can hear some clips here ---> Link

Clarity ... or not?

In the introduction of Brian McLaren's new book A Generous Orthodoxy he writes the following:

“…as in most of my other books, there are places here where I have gone out of my way to be provocative, mischievous, and unclear, reflecting my belief that clarity is sometimes overrated, and that shock, obscurity, playfulness, and intrigue (carefully articulated) often stimulate more thought than clarity.”

After having thought about this for a while I am curious to hear what the readers in blog land think. As a teacher I wrestle with how much to lay out there for my listeners. Should a teacher or preacher or writer "bottom line" everything so that there is no possible question to his hearer what he/she thinks the material he/she is teaching, preaching, or writing about means? I've heard some call this placing the cookies on the bottom shelf so that everyone can reach them.

Or would you rather have "provocative, mischievous, and unclear" or "shock, obscurity, playfulness, and intrigue" or even just narrative to help generate thought while in most cases leading you to some good conclusions.

Jesus, when he taught, didn't always lay out explicit details. He didn't say "the Kingdon of Heaven is..." He said "the Kingdom of Heaven is like ..." and then would give examples that sometimes his hearers had a hard time interpreting.

What do you think?

Another blogger

There is another blogger added to the blogosphere. Check out the personal musings of my good friend Dan Deans. ---> Link

Running the NYC Marathon ... not me, Edwin.

I am happy with my own company and I enjoy things that require solitude and disciple. I think that’s why I like to read so much; it’s just a book and me. I also like to run. I know that not every person who runs does so in solitude, but I do. I like getting out before the sun comes up and running a couple of miles or so. It is a perfect start to the day.

Although I am not the ultimate human specimen, running allows me to eat the brownie sitting in front of me as I type and stay reasonably close to my weight limits.

When someone finds out that I run occasionally they will ask if I’ve ever run a marathon. Although I haven’t run one, I have trained for two. A marathon is 26.2 miles. Training for a marathon is a tremendous amount of work. It consumes your life – from the way you eat, drink, sleep and live. A person can train for weeks and injure himself or herself and end their quest for a marathon.

That’s what happened to me the first time. I trained for months and ran the 20k warm-up race. I ran in a new pair of shoes on overpasses in Houston and I ran too fast. I injured my illiotibial band and I couldn’t run for a couple of months.

I trained for my second marathon the next year. I got up to a 17-mile long run and ran the 25k warm-up race. Then I got a job in Houston and started driving two-hours a day to work and back and had no time to train, which ended my marathon bid.

I’ve always said that I will run a marathon some day. Maybe …

I’d admire a person who takes the time and effort to train for and finish a marathon. Edwin Quarles is training for the New York City marathon and is blogging about the journey here ---> Link Check it out.

My Daughter is a Survivor

On April 21st Tori, our 13 year old daughter, had surgery to have a stainless steel rod attached to her spine to correct her scoliosis. She had worn a hard plastic brace that wrapped around her body and extended from her waist to just under her arms for a year and a half. One day she went in for a check-up and her doctor told her and Andrea “The brace is not working we will have to do surgery.” The doctor’s news hit us hard because the brace had held her spine relatively straight since she had worn it.

On the morning of Tori’s surgery Andrea and I kissed her and told her we were praying for her as she lay down in a rolling bed that was wheeled away down a long hall towards surgery. It was one of the hardest moments of my life - to trust our daughter into the hands of doctors, anesthesiologists and nurses. I get emotional just thinking about it.

As I think about it though, that’s what we have to do with God. Let Him have control of everything (the things which we can and cannot control).

After about four hours of surgery, Andrea and I went to see Tori in the recovery room. She was tired, sore and thirsty but in good shape for having her back cut open and rods installed into her spine. Andrea looked at me when we were finally able to touch our daughter again and help her as she recovered and she said “I can do this.” Being away from Tori during surgery was hard but being in her presence again made it better.

She got out of the hospital and as she recovered the incision on her hip where they took bone for a graft around her spine started hurting. At a check-up with her doctor we found out that she had an infection and would have to go back to Texas Children’s for surgery to clean that spot. After another week long stay and multiple surgeries, Tori was released from the hospital a second time. She had intravenous antibiotics for a while and then had to take antibiotics by mouth to kill the infection. Last night at nine o’clock she took her last antibiotic. And tonight we plan to surprise her (shhhh) with a Survivor Party.

We asked a bunch of close friends and family who went through all of this stuff to come over and watch the first Survivor of the new season (which Tori loves) and celebrate our daughter’s survival.

I am amazed at how well Tori has handled these last five months (and more). She has grown so much and I for one am impressed. Tori is our Survivor!

I know that so many families go through so much worse. I am grateful that it was not harder. God has been very good to us.

I love you Tori!

To blog or not to blog, that is the question.

My good friend Danny is starting a church in Northwest Houston called "The Way" and he asks the following question about blogging:

I have heard that this is an innovative way to understand and interact with "real" people. Is this true?

Go on over to his blog and tell him what you think here ---> THEWAY

...that I may know Him

“There have been men before now who got so interested in proving the existence of God that they came to care nothing for God himself … as if the good Lord had nothing to do but exist! There have been some who were so occupied in spreading Christianity that they never gave a thought to Christ. Man! Ye see it in smaller matters. Did ye never know a lover of books that with all his first editions and signed copies had lost the power to read them? Or an organizer of charities that had lost all love for the poor? It is the subtlest of all the snares.”

Having just returned from a staff retreat, this section of The Great Divorce from C.S. Lewis hit me hard. I came back from the retreat thinking about church environments, church systems, church processes, and church organizations which are all good. But Jesus said to me through C.S. Lewis, “Tommy, in all of the talk of process, which is necessary, don’t forget Me!”

Sometimes in the logic and analysis, I miss the forest for the trees.

[For my determined purpose is] that I may know Him [that I may progressively become more deeply and intimately acquainted with Him, perceiving and recognizing and understanding the wonders of His Person more strongly and more clearly], and that I may in that same way come to know the power outflowing from His resurrection [which it exerts over believers], and that I may so share His sufferings as to be continually transformed [in spirit into His likeness even] to His death, [in the hope] Link

By the way - the staff retreat was good for us (the staff of BPF) and for our church. We accomplished some good stuff, and had fun playing together. To read more about it ... see what Ronnie has to say here --->Link

My new bike ...

Trek 7200FX

I really like it! It's good to be riding again.

Staff Retreat

BPF's staff is going on a three day retreat. We will be back Wednesday afternoon.

I won't blog again until I get back unless I can find a computer somewhere. Pray for us and we'll talk again later this week.

Later ...

Stuff Mart

Today we’re having a garage sale; trying to get rid of some of our stuff. As I look around at our stuff I see a few things that are mine that are for sale and think “we can’t sale that … It’s mine!” The problem though is that I haven’t worn it or used it in a year … why would I possibly still need to keep it?

Sometimes I am so tied to my stuff.

So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

Contrarians

I just finished Steven Sample’s book, The Contrarian’s Guide to Leadership. I am not a leadership book reader normally. I find that leadership books can get bogged down in corporate speak that becomes cumbersome to read.

But The Contrarian’s Guide to Leadership was as much about how to live the contrarian’s life as it was about how to be a good leader. Thinking gray, thinking free, artful listening, decision making, reading, and knowing which hill you are willing to die on are all aspects of most people’s lives; not just leaders.

For those of you who are into reading that kind of thing I highly recommend it.

Financial Peace - Better Together

Last night we (Andrea and I) finished a thirteen week course called Financial Peace University. The information was good, Dave Ramsey is an entertaining guy, and it has caused Andrea and me to rethink the way we manage, or in some cases mismanage, the financial resources God has given us.

That’s not the best part though. I have grown quite a bit in the last 13 weeks. Not because I got good information (although I did), not because the class caused me to reflect on how I live (it did); but I have grown because of the interaction I have had for the last thirteen weeks with real people. People who were willing to get real about where they struggled and cheer the rest of us on when we had victories and encourage us to keep going in defeat.

That’s why at BPF we are sold on small groups (home teams). Ideally, in home teams people get real with one another about where they struggle and where they are strong. They talk about what it means to live life as a follower of Jesus and encourage one another to keep going when things get rough and cheer with each other in the victories.

I’m going to miss Financial Peace not because I like learning how to do financial stuff, or enjoy Dave Ramsey’s wit. I’m going to miss Financial Peace because of the bond I formed with some fellow strugglers as we met together on Thursday night.

Email

Email is such an incredible form of communication. I can sit in my office and communicate with anyone who happens to have an email address about anything I feel like typing.

Email is such a horrible form of communication. Sometimes I try to write something funny in an email and it's seen as sarcastic and/or arrogant. There is no non-verbal communication happening in email like body language or tone of voice. Any of those things can be read into email and completely change the intended meaning.

I love/hate email ... I can't decide.

Counting

All of my life I have work in jobs where the result of my labor was easy to quantify. I was the son of a mechanic and working for dad, if you fixed a car in a reasonable amount of time and it didn't return as a result of your repair you were doing a good job. In the maintenence discipline of the petro chemical world, if you could keep it from breaking and fix it if it did break you were doing a good job. In the engineering world if a project finished on time, under budget, actually worked as designed and the client was happy you were doing a good job.

This Discipleship Pastor stuff is a whole different world. Spiritual formation, spiritual growth, and spiritual health are not about what we are, but who we are. It is not about knowing or doing, it is about becoming. And how do you measure what those you pastor are becoming? It is way more abstract than anything I have ever done in a job before.

The results mean way more than whether Tommy is doing a good job or not. The results have consequences way beyond me. It's about the potential of real people becoming who God designed them to be. (BTW - I am not looking for the sympathy comment - "Tommy you are doing a good job". So don't even go there in the comment section...)

" A lot of what can be counted doesn't count, and a lot of what counts can't be counted."
- Albert Einstein

Brains and dinnertime conversations

Today at school Jakeb fell and hit his head. He hit it hard enough to knock him out for a second or two, so Andrea picked him up at school and took him to the emergency room to make sure he was okay. They did a “CAT” scan and found out that he has a concussion and will be okay. We get to wake him up every two hours through the night. It’s sure to be fun for both him and us. Andrea said that one of us should get a good night’s sleep so I assume she’s taking one for the team.

The CAT scan was beneficial because we found out that our son does in fact have a brain. Something that everyone in our family has questioned at times – Jakeb included.

The emergency room folks told him it would be a good idea to consume only liquids tonight in case he got nauseated. But Andrea made a good chef salad and Jakeb likes salad so he decided to forgo the liquid diet. “I’d rather throw up than be hungry” is the phrase he used. His head hurts but it didn’t seem to affect his stomach.

I tried to be the “spiritual dad” and ask “what made you feel closest to God today” (an idea from the book Sleeping with Bread). But Jakeb ended the spiritual direction of the conversation when he said, “this salad tastes pretty good. But I bet it will taste nasty as puke.” And so goes the dinnertime conversation at the Stunz house.

BTW - Jakeb approved this post before it was published ...

Credit and Blame

When I do well at anything, my nature is to take credit for it. When I fail my nature is to blame it on something on someone else.

On occasion of "doing well" Brother Lawerence says:

Lord I can not do this unles you enable me, and then I receive strength that is more than sufficent.

And then when he failed Brother Lawrence says:

I will never do otherwise if you leave me to myself, it is You who must hinder my failing and mend what is amiss.

I pray that I will give the credit to God for when I do well and know when I fail it is because I would never do otherwise were it not for Him.

Listening

Steven Sample president of USC in his chapter titled Artful Listening from the book The Contrarian’s Guide to Leadership says:

The average person suffers from three delusions: (1) that he is a good driver, (2) that he has a good sense of humor, and (3) that he is a good listener.

This chapter made me question myself and how well I listen. Do I listen only for a few sentences, rush to judgment and then spend the rest of the time others are talking formulating a response? Too often that describes my listening style. I want to learn to listen so that I can understand the perspective of the person who is speaking.

The times where I really listen are far more beneficial to me as well as the person speaking. I end up gaining new perspectives that my personal bias would never have allowed me to see otherwise.

Sometimes my biggest problem is that I like the sound of my own voice too much …

I REALLY like the new ministry assistant ...

I used to work in the industrial world. I started as an instrument technician for Amoco Chemical in Texas City a long time ago and when I left the secular world last year I was in instrument engineering. Now I am in the ministry as the discipleship pastor for Brazos Pointe Fellowship. There is a long story that could be written from those couple of sentences but now is not the time or place.

When I had a job in the secular world, Andrea didn’t really understand what I did at work. She understood some of the relationship aspects of my job but the technical part never really interested her. One of the biggest adjustments we had to make when I went into ministry is that Andrea now fully understood my job and not only did she understand it she was as passionate about it as I was. It got to the point where it consumed both of us and we had to say “You know what? No church stuff on Mondays.” There had to be an escape from ministry and I believe it’s healthy.

This week Andrea started to work at the BPF office part time. Our youngest went off to kindergarten and it became a win-win situation for both the church and us. She helps Kirk with Admin stuff and acts as special events coordinator.

It is really weird, after all of those years of work being totally separated from family life to have work now be a big part of family life… and marriage. I went to lunch with a friend the other day and the exchange went something like, “What do you do when you have an argument? You can’t go to work to escape.” I pretty sure escaping doesn’t make for a good relationship anyway.

It is good to have Andrea working about ten or twelve steps away from me. Even though she’s only that far away, we still sometimes communicate via email (what a world).

Mundane rhythm ... or not.

“…the biggest problem with the Christian life is that it is so daily.” – Bruce Shelley

This is the first sentence of the preface of The Practice of the Presence of God. I think it’s easier to find God in life when things are either going extremely well or when life is hard. It is harder though to be close to God when we get into living the mundane rhythm of life.

As I read of how Brother Lawrence worked in the kitchen of a monastery and was aware of God’s presence even while performing the most menial task, I am challenged to see God around me. So as I walked to work this morning (because I couldn’t ride my missing bike) I decided to “practice God’s presence” on the way.

It seems like a basic thing – to concentrate on God around me on the way to work - but it took effort. I had to pay attention or my mind would drift off and think about the most random subjects.

There are two sycamore trees on the way to work (up Sycamore St.). These two trees remind me of my childhood (my grandparent’s yard was full of sycamore trees); they remind me of Zacchaeus; and this morning they reminded me to think about God and how he exists all around me.

breathing air again

take the time to start anew
maybe it's in front of you

take the time to walk down the street
heaven knows who you might meet

take the time to be okay
and laugh a bit along the way

maybe you could take me for a ride
we could just drive all day

and breathe again
step outside the front door
gaze upon the stars
and know you're not alone
so run into the fields
scream louder than you can
it's good to be alive
and breathe air again

take the time to stop and stare
heaven's beauty everywhere

take the time to think about
someone else besides yourself

take the time to be okay
and laugh a bit along the way

maybe you could take me for a ride
we could just drive all day

and breathe again
step outside the front door
gaze upon the stars
and know you're not alone
so run into the fields
scream louder than you can
it's good to be alive
and breathe air again

- robbie seay band

Books

I love books. Not love in the sense of unconditional love but the kind of love that says, “this is really cool”. I love the smell of a new book; I love the smell of an old book; I love the way books feel … oh and I like to read them too. I like bookstores as well. When Andrea wants to shop she can just drop me off at the bookstore and I’m content to hang out until she’s done “gathering”.

Another thing about me is, I’m cheap. I agonize over buying stuff and I think it’s really cool when I find a deal.

Our local Christian bookstore has a room in the back with used books. It is my favorite part of the store. It has books, which I love, and cheap books, which I love even more. The words don’t change when someone reads them so I am cool with used books.

So imagine how geeked I was today when I found a five-dollar book with Brother Lawrence’s The Practice of the Presence of God and Teresa of Avila’s The Way of Perfection in the same volume.

A friend of mine recommended I read The Practice of the Presence of God a long time ago, so I’m glad I picked it up. It will be a while before I get to it but that’s okay. It’s been a pretty good day …

Personality .... does it fit?

I found a link to this free personality test on Scott Williams blog. Here's how I scored:





Type Five The Investigator The perceptive, cerebral type. Fives are alert, insightful, and curious. They are able to concentrate and focus on developing complex ideas and skills. Independent, innovative, and inventive, they can also become preoccupied with their thoughts and imaginary constructs. They become detached, yet high-strung and intense. They typically have problems with eccentricity, nihilism, and isolation. At their Best: visionary pioneers, often ahead of their time, and able to see the world in an entirely new way.


I have a hard time with some of this ... "visionary pioneer"? Yet on other parts I think it nailed me "preoccupied with their thoughts and imaginary constructs". I do kind of look like that guy in the picture. Others who have my personality: Albert Einstein (ha), Bill Gates, John Lennon, Stephen King, Tim Burton, Friedrich Nietzsche, Vincent Van Gogh, and Kurt Cobain. What a crowd.

If you know me do you think they got me right?

Click on the link above and try it for yourself.

I want to ride my bicycle ...

My bicycle of 13 years has come up missing. I bought it the month before Tori was born ... now it's gone. I rode it to work this morning and when I got there I was warned. "You should bring your bike inside where it will be protected from thieves who come only to steal kill and destroy." But I ignored the sound advice and left my bike outside. After 13 years of leaving it everywhere, I find it ironic the day I was warned is the day it disappeared. Maybe those who took my white bike will send a ransom note.

Having to walk home and back for lunch was probably good for me anyway.

Sing it with me "I want to ride my bicycle, I want to ride my bike ..."

Vanity Fair

Andrea and I are attending Financial Peace, a financial class here at BPF. I highly recommend it. The class has been good for us, as we sit with others who are rethinking what it means to handle the resources God has given us in a way that pleases Him. We are in the middle of the "rethink" process ourselves.

Tonight I was reading through a section of Pilgrim's Progress. It is an allegory of Christianity as a journey in life through the eyes of a pilgrim named Christian. Christian encounters various trails, troubles and friendships as he travels to the Celestial City (heaven), which really is the beginning of the journey.

I came across the passage where Pilgrim and his friend Faithful must pass through the town of Vanity and through a fair there called, what else ... Vanity Fair.

But that which did not a little amuse the merchandisers was, that these pilgrims set very light by all their wares; they cared not so much as to look upon them; and if they called upon them to buy, they would put their fingers in their ears, and cry, Turn away mine eyes from beholding vanity, and look upwards, signifying that their trade and traffic was in heaven.

We live in such a materialistic and consumer driven society that says buy it because "you deserve it". We live in Vanity Fair.

I wish I would more often be like pilgrim; light in my wares, with my fingers in my ears so I would become deaf to the cry of the merchant and turn my eyes toward heaven signifying that my “trade and traffic is in heaven”.

Someday our consumer driven culture called Babylon will fall and like Tony Campolo says:

“When Babylon falls, then, saints lose nothing, for they have invested elsewhere: the kingdom of God”

Words

I've been catching a hard time about the way I speak lately. It doesn't have anything to do with the South Texas "twang" I inherited from growing up here. It seems that I do not use correct grammar. I say "Me and Jake went camping" instead of "Jakeb and I went camping".

But isn't the point of talking to communicate where the hearer understands? Unless the hearer has a personal bias against bad grammar and shuts me out, will he/she still not get the point?

I have a friend who is starting a church. He calls people who have not yet stepped over the line of faith "pre-Christians". He ended up in an argument with another person over whether it is okay to call a person a "pre-Christian" because we are bestowing on them the sacred title of "Christian".

A church Andrea and I visited in D.C. spent countless hours arguing over whether to call the new addition to the church the fellowship hall or some other name. The arguments were heated and people were passionate and angry that church "tradition" could be ruined by the improper naming of a building.

Don't get me wrong. I believe words are important. I agonize over how to say the right thing in the right way as I teach. I just think that sometimes we communicate the same concepts with different words having the same meaning, yet waste time arguing over semantics.

Keep reminding them of these things. Warn them before God against quarreling about words; it is of no value, and only ruins those who listen.
2 Timothy 2:14 (NIV)

Well I've got to quit writing now ... me and Andrea are going to lunch with our daughter ... or is it Andrea and I ... oh, you get the point.

Leadership Summit Reflections

I started out before the leadership summit thinking through the tension that exist between being an organizational technician and a spiritual sage. The summit ended well with Bill Hybels addressing that tension.

He said that the laws of leadership are important and most of the time they dovetail nicely with the demands of discipleship. But there are times when the laws of leadership collide with the demands of discipleship and discipleship must win every time.

Bill Hybels said "We are building churches not Fortune 100 companies. We are dealing with destinies, not dollars. We are disciples of Jesus and citizens of the kingdom of heaven 1st. We should be in the habit of listening to the Holy Spirit, then we will hear His voice during the collision of leadership and discipleship and can follow Him."

Ronnie commented on my first leadership summit post and said that we can be both organization technicians and spiritual sages and I believe that he is right. Be a strong leader, because the church needs good strong leadership. Strong leadership is written all over the stories of the Bible. But leave room for God because often He says "I will do it in such a way that only the Most High could have accomplished when the best of human leadership would have failed."

Good leadership is influencing folks to follow God's direction anyway.

The Leadership Summit caused me to reflect on myself. It inspired me to lead by influence in relationship. It was well worth going.

Leadership Summit Day 2

Steven Sample, president of USC is one of the most intriguing people I’ve heard so far. He is a extremely intelligent guy who has both an artsy and technical mind and yet seems like he could be my grandpa.

He wrote the book, “The Contrarian’s Guide to Leadership”. A contrarian is someone who thinks, not counter to conventional wisdom, but one who uses their mind “to break free of conventional thinking so as to bring your natural creativity and intellectual independence to the fore”. Makes me wish I were one.

Tim Sanders told me to live from my abundance rather than from my scarcity. He also quoted Dale Carnegie: “You will accomplish more in two months by trying to get to know two people than you will in two years trying to get two people to know you.”

And Marcus Buckingham was very business-like as he reminded me to be “beautifully clear” in my communication.

Just some random thoughts from day two ...

Leadership Summit 1st Day

Today was a good day. Nice and cool which is weird for Texas in August. The Leadership Summit was good and I learned some stuff.

Bill Hybels said sometimes I have to do what leadership requires, not just what fits into my nice neat schedule; especially during "challenge peaks".

Pat Summitt made me ask myself "Would I want to work with me?"

And then Bishop T.D. Jakes Sr. got up and spoke. No matter what you think of T.D. Jakes style or theology, he is a man who obviously loves God and is one of the most dynamic speakers I have ever heard. Of the three speakers, he brought the most substance. More than I could possibly write here, in fact I am still processing some of it.

Questions T.D. Jakes made me ask myself:

Am I seeking God? If I am not I cannot take people to places spiritually I have not been myself!
Am I willing to be different? Am I comfortable in my own skin?

There are more, but these couple impacted me the most. I may write more tomorrow.

Leadership Summit

Tomorrow through Saturday I will be attending the Willow Creek Leadership Summit at a local satellite location.

Bill Hybels says "The local church is the hope of the world, and its future rests primarily in the hands of its leaders."

Brian McLaren says "Leadership must once again become a matter of love and spirituality, a place for spiritual sages, not just organizational technicians."

I think that the Leadership Summit will lean more towards organizational technician rather than spiritual sage. Although I see that in the last session Hybels will address when leadership and discipleship clash. The question I ask myself is can the organizational technician and the spiritual sage exist in the same body? There has to be some organizational technician or the church would be chaotic.

And the second question I ask myself is how many times have I allowed the organizational technician in me to organize God out of the picture? As in everything else there is a balance.

I look forward to the next couple of days for the change in routine and what I might possibly learn from some incredibly sharp people. I'll let you know how it goes.

Hintze's blogging

Our guitarist at BPF, Phillip Hintze is blogging. He says in his profile that he is "almost functional" as a guitarist. I think he's thinkin to lowly of himself ... check out his "waste of bandwidth" here ... link

Fighting with myself

I woke up this morning tired from going to bed late. My eyes had a hard time staying open, my legs were sore to the bone from working on the camper on Monday and running yesterday morning.

My plan was to run a couple of miles this morning but everything in me was finding an excuse to skip it. You know the drill. I'm thinking to myself "I really should run" but another part of my mind is saying "you really should check out that Wiggles video sitting on the TV." Anything to keep from having to get out of the door.

Eventually I convinced myself that I should at least put on my running shorts and make an attempt at it. But then I am distracted by a news story about the man President Bush named as the new director of the CIA. Funny, I've never cared about the CIA before.

After arguing with myself a little while longer I stepped outside the door and started a slow jog. I ran ... not far and not fast but I ran. And when I got home I felt excellent and wondered why I had ever argued with myself about it.

Why is it so hard to do something that makes me feel good and has so many benefits to my body and my mind? It just doesn't make sense.

Enchiladas or Gumbo?

Yesterday at the end of my message on loving God with all of your mind I tried to illustrate repentance by saying that it was like finding yourself going down a road in the wrong direction. Say you are going to San Antonio and you go north to Houston and get on I-10. But on I-10 you make a mistake and head east toward New Orleans instead of heading west towards San Antonio. Realizing you have made a critical mistake because mexican food is much better than cajun food you pull off the side of the road. Repentance is not crying on the steering wheel of you car and feeling sorry that you are going towards New Orleans and then continuing in an easterly direction. Repentance is pulling over, turning the car around and heading towards San Antonio and some of the best mexican food in the world.

After the service, a lady came up to me and told me I was a blasphemer and that I had just not eaten the right cajun food. In fact I was amazed at how many people have a strong opinion about which food is better - mexican or cajun. Making the statement that mexican food is better was probably one of the more controversial subjects I've ever broached - imagine that.

Don't get me wrong, I like cajun food okay. It's just that there is nothing better than a hot plate of beef enchiladas thick with cheese. So hot that it burns your tongue when you first try to take a bite. With a side of refried beans, spanish rice and pico de gallo with small chunks of tomato, onion, celantro, and jalapeno. I am making myself hungry.

My oldest daughter and I read a book together and today were going on a "date" to talk about it. I think we'll have to go to El Toro for lunch.

Hmmmm ...

One of those weeks ...

Ronnie asked the question "Do you ever have those days..." on his blog last Sunday. Well my question is "do you ever have those weeks"?

My week hasn't been bad but it's been busy and some of the people with whom I'm closest have pointed out to me that in my overzealous desire to accomplish the tasks of the week I have had my blinders on to people.

It is so easy to be caught up in the process that you miss the point of the process all together. If you are one of those people who I passed by and ignored because my mind was somewhere else, I apologize, and if I know about it I'll try to find you and tell you in person.

"We are merely moving shadows, and all our busy rushing ends in nothing." Link

"No matter what I'm going through, it's not the destination, it's the journey" - Joseph Garlington

Trip to the Dentist

My daughter Anna and I had a daddy/daughter date to the dentist to get our teeth cleaned. The dentist is kind of scary sometimes but it helps when you have your 5 year old there to hold your hand and tell you there's nothing to worry about.

We both had a good experience and afterwards went to the snowcone shack on wheels that parks by the church office and got a sour apple snowcone to make the hygenist earn her money next time we go back.

Baseball Boredom

Last night Andrea and I went with her sister and brother-in-law to watch the Astros lose to the Atlanta Braves. We had a good time (not that I enjoy watching the Astros lose). With the exception of a few moments, the pace of the game was slow and the mood of the folks in the surrounding seats was one of general boredom. It seemed like the game was really an excuse for the people around us to pay $10 a piece to hang out with friends. Don't get me wrong it's a good thing to hang out with people and Andrea and I had fun with our relatives. But is baseball so slow that it's more about the company you're with than the actual game?

Baseball is one of those games that you have to understand and follow closely to really enjoy. I grew up watching baseball because my dad is a fan of the game and I have some interest in it. I just don’t have the will to follow a team through an entire season unless something extraordinary is happening (like the Astros of ’86).

If I only had one afternoon available for the entire year to watch one sporting event I wouldn’t pick a baseball game. I think I would have to pick a college football game.

What do you think?

Heat

I just finished mowing the yard. At 1:42 p.m. it's 94 degrees f. on the thermometer and the weather man says about 110 degrees f. heat index. I love summer time in Texas!

People I don't know ...

This morning I sat down with a small book written by Kenneth Boa. It is actually a journal where I can reflect on verses related to the historic creeds of the Christian faith.

As I read I thought of how people like Dr. Boa have affected my life without me ever actually getting to meet or know them. I've read a couple of books by Boa and they always cause me to grow. The same thing happens with people who aren't even living now like C.S. Lewis and Henri Nouwen. And people who are alive but I will possibly never meet like Erwin McManus, Ravi Zacharius, Dallas Willard, Robert Webber, Brian McLaren and others. Even the blogs I've been reading lately, some from people whose name I remember and some I've forgot.

On my last post I talked about how good it is to have close friends who challenge me to live the life Jesus called me to live. It's good to have friends who I don't know and may never know (this side of heaven) challenge me as well.

Friends

Yesterday I sat with friends I haven't seen in a long time. I had lunch with a close friend. Then later that night Andrea and I sat with another couple who are close friends over dinner at an Indian restaurant. These are good friends who in the past have known me well and have always challenged me about what it means to be part of the kingdom of heaven. They have been an encouragement to me as well. In both cases we picked up where we left off as if we'd never been apart.

There are not words to explain the benefits and joys of close friendships. I think it was C.S. Lewis who said something like "There is nothing better than good Christian friends and a fire". I know I probably butchered that quote but it's right. There is nothing like the company of good friends.

Knowledge

When I read what I've written here and elsewhere or listen to some of the messages I've preached it seems to me that sometimes I sound as if I've got life all figured out.  I hope you know that is not the case.  There are ideas and concepts and thoughts I have about life that I am completely convinced are true.  But there are also ideas and thoughts that I lean really heavily towards but don't have completely formed in my mind.  There are also thoughts I have hunches about that I cannot prove.  So how can you tell which are which?  I'll leave that for you to figure out on your own.

That's what's good about a blog.  I can "try on" some things as I write them down.  Dawson Trotman said:

     "Thoughts disentangle themselves when they pass through the lips and the fingertips."

And in this case my keyboard.  So don't think of me as a pompous arrogant know-it-all.  I'm just writing my thoughts to allow them to disentangle themselves.  And am surprised that anyone would want to read them.

I ran across this story on a June 11 post on One House:

     Once upon a time a visitor came to the monastery
     looking for the purpose and the meaning of life.

     The Teacher said to the visitor, "If what you seek
     is the Truth, there is one thing you must have above all else."

     "I know," said the visitor, "To find Truth I must have an
     overwhelming passion for it."

     "No," the Teacher said. "In order to find the Truth, you
     must have an unremitting readiness to admit you may be wrong."

You can read the entire post here ... Link

Marriage Mentoring

Brazos Pointe Fellowship is starting a ministry where an "experienced couple" spends time with a pre-married couple on 5 or 6 occasions before they get married. During their time together they talk through various topics related to their marriage that are beneficial to be discussed before the wedding day.  The more experienced couple mostly listens, but they help by offering advice and personal experience.  There is also some transparency on the part of the mentor couple to help the pre-married couple know that there is no perfect marriage and it takes work and while it is rewarding overall marriage sometimes gets hard.

My question to you.  What piece of advice do you wish someone would have given you and your spouse before you were married?

Feelings

Dallas Willard in Renovation of the Heart says:

" ...the feelings that harm us are, for the most part, not bad in themselves, but are somehow not properly limited or subordinated.  They are out of order.  Feelings are, with few exceptions, good servants.  But they are disastrous masters."

In the not so distant past I've allowed my feelings to be the motivation for what I did and did not do.  And Dallas Willard is right, they make disasterous masters.  It is far better to have the correct motivation for our actions than to perform our actions for a feeling.

For example, choosing to worship God because of the emotion it causes can be disasterous to my relationship with God.  Because when the emotion is gone (and it will go) I feel that God has left as well and my worship suffers.  So my motivation for worship should be because God deserves it and because it is "my reasonable service".

The same thing goes in my relationship with Andrea (my wife).  If my only motivation for love is the feelings I get from it, then when the feeling is gone I will decide I've "fallen out of love".  But when love is a choice and I love out of regard for the interest of the other I get more out of our relationship and the feelings associated with love aren't my master.  But when the feelings come ... they are an incredible bonus and are more satisfying than if I pursued the feeling alone.

These are lessons I've learned the hard way.

Lance Armstrong

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I know this is old news but was that incredible or what? .... Link

Potential

Andrea and I went to a church called Ecclesia this weekend in Houston with friends.  The Pastor Chris Seay was preaching Numbers chapter 13 and 14.  In it, is the telling of how the Israelites came to the promised land and sent 12 spies to check the place out.  Of the 12 only Joshua and Caleb were interested in going in and taking the land with God's help.  All of the others were scared and pretty belligerent about the fact that they could never overcome the giants that lived in this incredible place.

Out of that message I had to ask myself - how often have I missed out on the potential of what God has for me because I didn't believe.  Because I didn't have the faith that God could overcome what seemingly stands in my way.  How many times have I blown people off because I don't see the potential God's placed in them and the potential they have if they would just step Godward.

God keep my eyes on you to where the giants don't seem so BIG ...but very small ...

I'm a BLOGGER now ...

Blogs have been a facination to me in recent months.  I enjoy reading what people have to say about various subjects and now ... I look forward to posting different stuff myself. 

Jesus talked about living life in the Kingdom of Heaven and mostly, that's what I want to post.  How do I find my way while trying to live this "Kingdom" kind of life?  I'll post some serious stuff but some stuff not so serious.

So check back if you would like and have your say by commenting on my posts. 

This ought to be fun.