Notice though that I wrote “I don’t fear many things”. There are some things that make me lay awake at night and stare at the ceiling. One of those is the fear of not being able to provide for my family. Its part of my life I have had a hard time giving to God and saying “Take it, do what you want and I won’t ever ask for it back.” I’m getting better with that one though.
In the last couple of years I’ve developed a new fear. I fear standing up in front of people to preach and not having anything to say. I’m not talking about the fear of public speaking, in fact I feel really comfortable in front of people when I know I’m saying what God wants me to say. It’s just in the process of preparing I shudder at the thought of standing up and mocking God and wasting the time of everyone listening with useless information. I think it is a healthy fear though as long as it doesn’t take over. In fact if I ever get nonchalant about teaching I should probably quit.
My child, don't lose sight of good planning and insight. Hang on to them, for they fill you with life and bring you honor and respect. They keep you safe on your way and keep your feet from stumbling. You can lie down without fear and enjoy pleasant dreams. You need not be afraid of disaster or the destruction that comes upon the wicked, for the Lord is your security. He will keep your foot from being caught in a trap.
Proverbs 3:21-26
What do you fear?
5 comments:
when i was in youth group,...we would always have these speakers that either knew a person or just told of a story where someone grew up in church,..always thought they were saved..really thought they were saved..but during some breakdown emotional 'revival' type meeting, "came to a realization" that they weren't. Having been brought up in church myself, for me, this reinforced a constant wondering if i was Really ever saved. I mean, how do you know...since your life was never really 'turned upside down' after you met christ because He and salvation were the most natural person and concept since you can remember? Another of my adolescent 'demons' was the concept of dying....and its all a lie. I mean, its not really possible, but c'mon i know i'm not the only one who's thought...Oh my gosh...what if it really isn't true...i mean it is..but what would happen if it weren't and God really was on the planet Kolob having spiritual babies eternally like the Mormons believe? (that knowledge thanks to Ronnie's church history class projects. :) All that to say...i've come to terms with my doubting thomas-like spirit, so the notion of no hope in Christ would definitely be my worst fear. But then..."The Lord is the stronghold of my life...whom (or what) shall I fear?"
As a side note...Thanks Ronnie! The knowledge i gained in your class on Church History at BCS is still proving valuable to me.
Mindy – we all have our doubting Thomas. It is natural and I think extremely healthy to ask questions. In fact, I think when we stop questioning our faith we stop really living … we stop really learning. I dig having people ask me the hard questions so much that I’ve started trying to ask them of myself. That’s what it takes to be a life-long learner.
Thank you, Mindy. I really enjoyed teaching that class.
Joshua 1:9
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."
Since I learned this verse I really don't fear anything. Well...almost anything...maybe just snakes and rats.
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