Me or the thought of me

I am almost embarrassed to say that I have seen the movie Failure to Launch - twice. Once on a plane to Nepal and once, at my suggestion, Andrea and I rented it and watched it at home. It wasn't a horrible movie but it was not great either; just a diversion.

There is a part of the movie where the main character, Tripp who is a boat salesman, is talking to his "nephew" as they sit next to a boat. The kid says something to the effect of "I love this boat." To which Tripp replies "You don't love this boat. You are just in love with the idea of a boat."

Profound dialog I think. I go through life loving the idea of many things but never really in love with the things themselves. Just like people love the idea of a boat but would never spend the time, work or money required to actually enjoy the thing, I love the idea of stuff but I am never going to spend the time, money or effort to actually experience those same things at the highest levels.

I would love to lift weights and have big muscles and be stronger. But truthfully I don't love to lift weights because it is not convenient.

I would love to save money. But I am only in love with the idea of making good investments for my future because really I love to spend money NOW.

I would love to practice the faith I say I believe. But when it comes down to it I love laziness rather than discipline and actually acting on the things I say I believe doesn't fit my self-centeredness. My faith is sometimes only a good idea rather than a reality.

I was running last week and listening to John Mayer. On his new CD Continuum he has this song called "I Don't Trust Myself" where he asks this girl "Who do you love - me or the thought of me?"

I am in love with the thought of being in love, but sometimes love takes a lot of work. To lay down my life for another person and to look after her interests rather than my own is beyond what I am sometimes willing to do. Will I go beyond the mere idea of being in love and do the hard work love requires?

I hope so. She is worth it.